high energy...

a couple of weeks ago I went to IKEA for an afternoon, basically just to get out of the house and I usually spend less money there than at the mall or Target, and of course I had Dash and Mackey with me. I let Dash walk  really run in the store because I wasn't in the mood to fight him to sit in the cart or stroller and he does enjoy running around large places with lots of people. I had Mackey in his sling so I had both arms free to try to contain Dash. That didn't prevent me from chasing after him for most of the time yelling his name. I kid you not - at least 7 people said to me as I yelled at Dash and tried to make sure he wasn't going too far, "wow, you really named that kid right".  ha. had i known i probably would have named his Slomo or Pokey because the kid is fast and NEVER stops. Every playgroup I join or mama friend I have describes Dashy as a "sweet kid, he is just high energy". Seriously, they will say it as they give me that look that says "I'm glad its you and not me" and buckle thier 4 year old in a stroller to walk away.

he is a good kid. he does have a lot of energy. he doesn't nap and he is only 2. he is very sweet and i have never seem him do anything to purposefully harm someone else. he is daring. he has no fear. he climbs to the highest parts of the playground equipment while his older friends just watch in awe. he likes to get dirty. i just don't like the label of "high energy" - he is a 2 year old, aren't they supposed to be crazy and full of life? I don't want that label to turn into "hyperactive" because there is such a negative connotation that goes along with that. i like his energy. he keeps me on my toes. i don't mind that it takes an extra hour to get through Target because he insists on walking and investigating everything, if i did, i would just wait until I could go by myself. I know one day his listening skills will be better and I wont have to call his name one million times - but I don't want to break his spirit when he is having fun and relatively obeying me, even if he is spinning in circles one hundred times around the aisle at Publix. he is just a kid. he is having fun. no need to label him.

Disney Disney

We just got back from what was supposed to be a 4 day vacation to Disney World. Dash ended up getting really sick so our fun trip was cut short but for the 2 hours that we managed to get to the Magic Kingdom, Dashy loved it. He loved the characters and attempted to cut in lines that were probably hours long to sneak a hug of Piglet and Pooh - it was hiliarious. He really wasn't himself, which is wild and crazy, so a calm and happy being in the stroller Dash was kind of a nice surprise because if he wasn't sick he would have been running wild! We bought Annual Passes this year - so hopefully we will back a few times and Dash can enjoy everything without being sick. Mackey slept in his sling the entire time  --- he wasn't too impressed.

5 things noone told me...

you know when you find out your pregnant and everyone starts telling you all sorts of advice that you really don't want to hear...well there is a lot of stuff that they leave out, or at least that is how it seems. maybe as your kids grow up you forget about the chaos that are those first years - just like how you blissfully remember childbirth somehow totally forgetting about those hours spent screaming that you were never going to do it again. these are just five things that noone told me and i'm not sure I would want to know.

1. You will be tired.  Not just I didn't get enough sleep kind of tired, b/c knock on wood, I have been blessed with children that sleep all night, but the kind of exhaustion that just overtakes your body. I don't know if it is from chasing after a fast toddler or calming a crying baby all day but by 8 o'clock at night my body is ready to shut down. I need to sit on the couch and watch stupid reruns of How I Met Your Mother and Friends just to decompress.

2. There is no time for showers, especially alone. If I want to shower these days, it seems like there is always a little blonde man showering with me.  It is not relaxing and not a daily occurance. I think greasy hair looks good on me and am greatful for the person that invented deodorant.

3. You probably have no idea what you are doing. You can read books or talk to other parents or doctors but in the end you are just grasping at this parenting thing. At the end of the day - if the babies are alive in thier beds, you did your job. No amount of education will prepare you for a 2 year olds tantrum in the middle of Nordstrom with nannies, moms and sales clerks all staring and waiting to see what you do. What works for one parent and child, most likely is not going to work for you. I try to make good choices but I know a lot of times they probably are not the right ones - I just want my kids to be happy and hope I don't mess them up to much.

4. There is a lot of poop. Sometimes I feel like I am cleaning up poop, thinking about when they will poop or talking to my husband about their poop ALL DAY LONG. I also like to leave all the poopy diapers tied tight in little orange poop bags in front of the front door every day so when my Husband gets home he can see how much poop he missed out on. I don't think he finds it amusing - but I do! I'm sure the UPS man loves it too.

5. Children's Television may have been created by the devil. The incessant high pitched voices and stupid littel ditties that get stuck in my head are enough to drive me crazy - as if 2 crying kids under the age of 3 weren't enough. Elmo, Ernie, Barney and the entire cast of Imagination Movers are after my sanity. But the kid loves it and he actually does learn a lot from most of them so instead of watching The View we are stuck with reruns of The Wiggles.

5 months

Mack's 5 month birthday fell on the same day that I found out I was pregnant last year. I found out really early and the test was super light but it was definetly positive. We were leaving for Disney World that evening and I waited to tell Brent until it felt right. I ended up blurting it out somewhere on I-4 between Tampa and Orlando. It feels like that just happened  and now that light line on the pregnancy test is a happy 5 month old!

He is the happiest little man - he loves to smile, coo and laugh. He laughs when Dashy gives him hugs or I sing him silly songs or the dog sits too close to him and puts his furry tail on his head. He laughs with his whole body - cliching his fists, legs to his chest kind of laugh. He HATES his carseat with a passion and screams whenever we get ready to go somewhere. He's not the kind of baby that is happy to just sit in his seat when at the store - I have to be wearing him so he can look around and take everything in. He is not a fan of tummy time and rolls over pretty much immediately after he is put on his belly. He rolls over from his back to his front sometimes too but is usually more content on his back.

He is just a little delayed for a 5 month old but is right on track for the 3 month old he is supposed to be - sometimes it is hard to remember that he isn't going to be doing everything as early as Dash did. By 5 months, Dash was sitting up and starting to crawl all over the place. I am kind of glad Mack is not crawling around, I don't think I am ready for that! And I really do not want another 8 month walker --- that is too soon, I want to enjoy this little baby as a baby not a toddler!

We love the little man and are so glad that he is healthy and happy and thriving!

after...

its almost impossible to describe or explain - but that moment when your slippery baby comes sliding out is totally surreal. there is relief, fear, excitement and so many other emotions all happening in one millisecond when that babe enters the world. I remember thinking as I saw the doctor hand him to the nurses how small he was, I remember hearing those tiny squeeks that signified life, I remember my eyes meeting Brents and just staring in awe at the little person that we created. The NICU team checked him over - he was better than expected, small but resiliant, a little fighter. Then they handed him to me - it had probably been no more than 3 minutes since he was born but those 3 mintues seems like a lifetime. I needed to hold him, needed to see w/ my own eyes and touch him w/ my own hands, to see that he was okay. I kissed his small head and looked at every part of his perfect minature body. I told him I loved him, that everything was going to be okay. and then just as quickly has he had arrived - they took him away. Brent left too - he went w/ Mackey to the NICU at the attached Children's Hospital. I was alone - no baby, no husband. Just the doctor and a nurse - it seemed so quiet compared to the 20 people that had been in the room for his arrival just moments before. Less than an hour later I was moved to a mother and baby room - except I had no baby. My room was small and didn't have the usual items found in the room. There was no baby bassinet or diapers or excited people waiting to meet the babe - just me and Brent and the worst headache I had ever had. It seems weird for me to think of now -but right after Mack was born, I had horrible migraine and had to sleep. and I slept for a long time - I didn't have to worry about taking care of a newborn or toddler, so I slept for almost 14 hours.  Five months later,  the experience doesn't really seem real. I had just had a baby but for that first day when I was alone in that room, it was as if nothing had changed when in reality everything had.

before

5 months ago from yesterday I was admitted to the hospital for bedrest for the 2nd time to try to keep little yet unnamed little man from making an appearance too early. It seems so long ago - but I can still remember those lonely nights with no toddler stealing my covers or grouchy brown dogs growling at me if I were to move too close to her. I knew that I wouldn't be leaving until the baby was born, I would be leaving a totally different person and different mother - the next time I walked outside my entire world would have changed.

I entered the hospital on August 12 with contractions every 3 minutes and 6-7 cm dialated - everything said the baby would be here soon. I was in denial - the contractions started when I woke up that morning, my mother in law was here watching Dashy so I could continue my home bedrest. I didn't tell her anything - i took a bath, tried to relax, packed a bag, called my husband. My husband came home, my mother in law was confused and we left for the hospital. We checked in and waited - for a very long time. I didn't look like I was in labor, there was no pain. I was talking and joking while we waited. I saw a friend's son walk in the lobby wearing a Big Brother shirt with his grandparents - she had just had her baby. My friend told me later that her inlaws told her that they saw one of her friends in the lobby - she asked if the person was pregnant, they said no. I didn't look super pregnant, I didn't look like I was in labor. I was. Again. Once I was finally put back in Triage - the same nurse that had declared that we were having this baby 2 weeks ago was working. She said I was 8 cm and the calmest person in advanced later that she had ever seen without drugs. I was put in an L&D room - it seems like there was confusion. The nurse orginally said they would not try to stop the labor - it was happening that day. The doctor came in - checked me and thought I was only 6cm, the orders where changed. They were going to try to stop it now. They tried Terbutiline - it did nothing except make me jittery. The doctors decided to start Magnesium (yuck) - not thinking it would work but it apparently it can help reduce the risk of CP in preemies. It worked. My labor stalled. In the morning I was moved to a Antepartum room.

To be perfectly honest - it was new and nice. I had my own large flat screen TV, 24 hour room service, wireless internet and a nice wheelchair accessible shower. Later that day, they took my IV's out. I was a free woman - well as free as someone can be when they are confined to a bed 23 hours a day. I napped, I read, I talked on the phone. Dash came to see me. My contractions all but disappeared. There was talk about me going home again the next morning but the doctor and I decided it would be best to stay at least a few more days. Brent came to see me on Saturday night, we played Scrabble and watched 3 episodes of Dexter. It was getting late, my Ambien was waiting and he was getting ready to leave. For some reason, he stayed to watch one more Dexter episodes - something about that loveable seriel killer that draws you in, and half way into it, something happened. My water broke. This time there would be no stopping the labor, I was too far dialated. This baby was really coming early. It was scary and exciting at the same time. One moment we were watching Dexter throw dead bodies into the ocean - the next, our whole lives were about to change. My heart raced, I wasn't sure what to do . I paged the nurse, she answered saying she would bring my sleeping pill. Change of plans - I think my water broke. She came in with some sort of test - there was no need for it. There was a lot of water. Things started happening - there were people and extra large wheelchairs and the hum of Dexter continuing to play on Netflix as decisions where made, personal items packed and we started the short journey to where our lives would change forever.

day 3 and beyond...

so day 3 did not go as well as I had hoped - he is definetly not potty trained but there has been progess. If he learned one thing it is that he can hold his pee for a very very long amount of time. Last night he peed at around 6 pm and then refused to go before he went to bed at 7:30 and when he woke up at 8 he was still dry and he didnt pee until 10 am. crazy - it is now 5:30 pm and he still hasn't peed again. so we have had no accidents but only for the fact that he is refusing to pee.  im tempted to put a pull up on him so he can pee bc i know he has to go.

i dont know why the program didn't work - but he is more aware of his body and does let me know when he has to go. I think I am going to keep him in his underwear at home but maybe use a pullup when we go out because for sanity issues I cannot just stay at home for weeks at a time.

i think part of his issue is that he is scared to pee on the potty - he screams any time that he does it so he is just holding it in so he doesn't have to do it. smart kid i guess. I might buy him this little urinal thing that I saw at babies r us - it probably would be super messy but I think he would use it!

if anyone has any potty training tips or ideas - i am open to any suggestions bc I am done w/ diapers for him so he is going to have to learn one way or the other!

potty training day 2

so day 2 is done and im not quite as optimistic that we are going to be done in 3 days - but so much progress has been made. We didnt really have any "real" accidents today - I think he would start peeing a little and stop himself while we ran to the potty so we still went through quite a few pairs of underwear, maybe 15 today, yesterday we probably went through 20 or more and he never did go #2 in the potty. He does tells us he has to go and is definetly holding it between bathroom trips - i think he holds it way longer than he should just becuase he doesn't want to go. Last night, he wet the bed once around midnight, we changed the sheets and he woke up dry and then did his business in the toliet!

i'm going to keep following the program - which means no diapers or pullups, ever. I guess we will be saving a lot of money but I am going to be nervous about taking him anywhere for awhile. Dash is already getting cabin fever - he cries to go in the car all the time so hopefully he catches on soon so we can venture out in the world.

wish us luck tomorrow --- b/c brent has to work and I will be attempting to follow dashy around the entire day and keep a 5 month old happy and fed.

potty training day 1

Dash turned 2 in October and I have been wanting to try to potty train him for awhile but he really didn't show any interest in the potty or even acknowledge when he had went to the bathroom so I didn't think he was ready. I had heard about Lora Jenson's 3 day potty training method and decided to try it but was not too optimistic that it would work.

I woke up as soon as Dash did and jumped right into the potting training. We started by throwing away all his diapers - (ok, we threw away like 5 and the rest were moved into Mack's room for when he is bigger) and made a big deal how he was a big boy now. He didnt seem to have to much interest in what was going on - all he wanted to do was watch Elmo.I put on his very first pair of big boy underwear and we waited. The morning wasn't so great - he had numerous accidents and we would rush him to the potty to finish his business. By the afternoon he was catching on and only had 1 accident - he would let us know that he had to pee or had just started peeing and we would go w/ him to the bathroom. He isn't too sure about the toliet and cries while he is peeing but he doesn't fight it. He is alseep in his bed right now only wearing underwear so I am anxious to see what happens tonight. I am assuming that we will be changing his sheets a couple of times but it will all be worth it in the end.

I am excited to see what happens tomorrow and on the 3rd day but I am more optimistic now than I thoought I would be.

3 track mind ....

I really would like to get into the head of a toddler just to figure out what is really going on in there - lately it seems that dash only thinks of 3 things. Elmo, Barney and Apples. He is somewhat speech delayed so he doesn't say all that much that most people can understand but from what I gather these 4 things are constantly going through his head. We will be doing something totally unrelated to his 4 obsessions and he will start talking about it. On Wednesday, we were at storytime at the library and he was busy singing, dancing and having fun and all of a sudden he stops and starts talking to me about Elmo, I am not sure what kind of point he was trying to make, maybe he wanted Elmo to come to storytime but he talked in his Norweigian language for probably 2 minutes about him before he returned his attention to storytime. Anytime we are driving anywhere - he basically talks about Apples the entire time, I assume this is because he knows McDonalds has apples and he is trying to get me to drive-thru to buy him some apples. But a 30 minute trip to the park is very annoying when the child is constantly saying -- apples, please, apple, apple every time I drive by anything that even remotely resembles a McDonalds.
I usually have to lay in bed w/ dash until he is asleep and last night after I thought he was asleep and was getting ready to leave, he sat up and said  "night barney, night elmo" and then laid back down and went to sleep - it was hilarious. how can someone think about those annoying characters all the time - it would drive me crazy!!

part of me thinks maybe he is watching too much sesame or barney - i try to limit it to just the morning but some days I give in to his pleas and put it on. He does learn a lot for sesame and likes to dance and sing along w/ barney. He isnt a child that will just sit on the couch - he is always doing like 40 things at one time, even when his best friends are on tv - so I hope his tv viewing isn't ruining his mind.

It just amazes me that his little brain is constantly thinking - even though he can't express everything yet.  I hope wants he starts talking more, he expands his interests a little bit b/c i am already very annoyed w/ the sesame gang and the giant purple dinosaur. Who knows maybe when he is speaking his own Norweigian dialect he is actually having a very civilized one-sided conversation w/ me and he thinks I am an idiot for not responding.

say goodbye..

to Dash's pacifer...that is what he did a few days ago. He woke up and decided out of the blue that pacifers were only for babies. He had went to bed w/ one like always and in the morning he wanted nothing more to do with it. Its all kinds of crazy bc that boy loved his pacifer and just like that - he gave it up!
 I wish I could wake up w/ a new mindset and stick to it - for example, maybe I should give up eating candy for breakfast. I know it is bad for me, I know I should eat an egg or some cereal but those Pretzel M&M's or that frozen Twix bar always call my name. Or maybe I should wake up and automatically remember that when I put laundry in the washer that I will have to put it in the dryer at some point. In my mind - I know that it is wasteful and time consuming to wash the same load of laundry 3 times but I just cannot remember it.
If a 2 year old can give up one of the only things that comforted him - I can surely work on one of these 2 things. Just not today because it is 4 o'clock and all I have eaten is M&M's, Hot Tamales, and Sour Patch Kids and I am in the process of washing the same load of yesterdays laundry for the 3rd time.