a decade ago

i was 20 and a sophomore in college on 9/11/01. I remember being woken up by Brent's fraternity roommates telling us that something bad had happened... we climbed out of the bunk and walked into their living area.  We watched the chaos that the first plane hitting had caused and I remember the banter of of discussing how that could happen but none of us had really understood the magnitude yet . But then we watched as the second plane came crashing into the 2nd tower and we just sat in stunned silence. In a room that was usually held drinking contests between frat boys and still had the solo cups from Monday night's party littering the bar - the raw emotions in that room between 12 college guys and me is hard to explain. In that very moment we all lost a lot of our innocence.  I left shortly later to make it to my drama class at 10:30 - half of the class wasn't there and our professor was her cheerful self. I remember the girl that told her what happen - her name was Autumn, she was on the swim team. Our professor, a young girl with a New York accent, immediately started crying. A minute later someone brought in a television set and we watched the rest of the morning unfold. Our professor dismissed class but we all stayed and watched. Hours later I finally made contact with my dad - he traveled a lot and had left Newark on a flight that earlier that morning. All those hours I never even considered he could have been on one of those planes. I still remember so much about that day --- I remember the email we got from our Communications professor telling us that our scheduled exam that evening was still going to happen - only did I make my way to campus to take the test that it had ultimately been cancelled. I remember the candlelight vigils and the general friendliness of everyone on campus in the weeks that followed. I remember the footage that played on our televisions 24/7. On this day I can't watch that footage - maybe it brings back too memories. maybe i don't want my children to try to comprehend such things. but whether I choose to watch or not - i will not forget.