Monday, February 27, 2012

the move.

finally. we have decided to move. move away from this house where we brought our babies home to, where we tried our best to make this little space our own but we are on to bigger and better things. Because of our awesome economy and the wonderful housing market in Florida we are not in a place where we can sell and actual make any money so we are going to rent it to hopefully a family that will love it as much as we used to. After doing some research and talking to a rental real estate agent we are able to rent it for quite a bit more than our mortgage so it just makes sense to hold on to it and hope that eventually the market goes up and we can sell it without losing everything! We looked at some houses this weekend and are going to go look at more tomorrow afternoon. We want a 2 story house (which in Florida isn't the easiest thing to find), we want a pool and we want a suburban neighborhood with excellent schools. Where we live now the public schools are horrible and if we were to stay would have to be paying for private school. The areas where we are looking at are almost the complete opposite of St. Pete. I will miss this area - i love the beaches and love love downtown. but i won't miss all the crazies walking around the streets and running out in front of my car, i won't miss the longest stop lights in the universe, i won't miss our stupid shower with the most unreliable shower pressure or the creepy pool guy who makes awkward conversation with me every Wednesday morning. It is crazy to think that this is actual going to be happening - we had kind of decided that we were stuck here. I am kind of nervous but way more excited about this new chapter!

Monday, February 6, 2012

get moving.

I need to workout. I need to do something for myself that doesn't involve going out for dinner and drinks with my friends. I am kind of lazy and seriously exhausted by the time my kids are in bed that working out almost feels like a punishment. I hate my gym. the daycare is dirty, my kids always get sick there and one of the workers is always eating tuna fish. gross. Apparently Brighthouse Cable has done away with exercise on demand - now i am actually going to have to pay Jillian Micheals to not do her DVD. I wish i could run - but i can't with my asthma flaring up and my lungs feeling like they are going to explode. and dash refuses to sit in a jogging stroller so unless i want to run along side him it isn't a very good option anyways. It's hard to find the motivation. but i hate being fat - even if i am not the fattest mom around, i feel fat and gross and like i always want to have a shirt on. (even if i was skinny i would probably like to have a shirt on too but when i am fat even more so). Occasionaly the thought crosses my mind that it would be easier to get pregnant and be allowed to be fat than to deal with it right now. but i don't want a baby - i have a crazy toddler that keeps me too busy to even freaking do a sit-up. I wish Target sold a liposuction kit - that would solve all my problems.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012


Today I am joining Shell at and pouring my heart out. Stop by and check out what other bloggers have to say.

This week a friend's 16 month old baby girl died suddenly. I was at a party when I got the message. My heart literally stopped and all I could think of is that I needed to see my own babies. I was enjoying a day to myself with old friends that I don't see nearly enough but I needed to get home to emerge myself into the everyday chaos. I cannot even imagine what they are going through. It hurts to even think about it.

Mack is at the crazy age that honestly is not my favorite. This week his craziness is definitely being viewed in a different perspective. He is here, he is healthy and his wildness just shows that his brain is working and that is growing into a little man. The messes he makes can easily be cleaned up. I am never going to regret hugging him or snuggling him instead of yelling at him for dumping out the entire bag of goldfish again. We have found that everyone is happier spending the entire afternoon at the playground.

I keep finding myself wishing away this stage - I wish he would listen, I wish he would not climb, I wish he would run slower, I wish he didn't wander into our bed to sleep every night. But I'm trying to change my perspective - he may not listen but he is hilarious and has the funniest facial expressions when he is doing something that he knows he is not supposed to do and he is actually a good climber - he climbed the entire tall curved ladder at the park yesterday - some 3 year olds can't even climb that!, he is fast and when he sprints I can barely catch him but he is strong and able and healthy and I kind of like the midnight snuggles and at least he just walks over now instead of someone having to walk over to his room to get him!

Perspectives change. I remind myself through the day to embrace this stage. to love his craziness. because I cannot even begin to imagine what it would be like if he wasn't here.

Please keep my friend and her family and their sweet angel Caroline in your prayers.