get moving.

I need to workout. I need to do something for myself that doesn't involve going out for dinner and drinks with my friends. I am kind of lazy and seriously exhausted by the time my kids are in bed that working out almost feels like a punishment. I hate my gym. the daycare is dirty, my kids always get sick there and one of the workers is always eating tuna fish. gross. Apparently Brighthouse Cable has done away with exercise on demand - now i am actually going to have to pay Jillian Micheals to not do her DVD. I wish i could run - but i can't with my asthma flaring up and my lungs feeling like they are going to explode. and dash refuses to sit in a jogging stroller so unless i want to run along side him it isn't a very good option anyways. It's hard to find the motivation. but i hate being fat - even if i am not the fattest mom around, i feel fat and gross and like i always want to have a shirt on. (even if i was skinny i would probably like to have a shirt on too but when i am fat even more so). Occasionaly the thought crosses my mind that it would be easier to get pregnant and be allowed to be fat than to deal with it right now. but i don't want a baby - i have a crazy toddler that keeps me too busy to even freaking do a sit-up. I wish Target sold a liposuction kit - that would solve all my problems.