Thursday, January 13, 2011


5 months ago from yesterday I was admitted to the hospital for bedrest for the 2nd time to try to keep little yet unnamed little man from making an appearance too early. It seems so long ago - but I can still remember those lonely nights with no toddler stealing my covers or grouchy brown dogs growling at me if I were to move too close to her. I knew that I wouldn't be leaving until the baby was born, I would be leaving a totally different person and different mother - the next time I walked outside my entire world would have changed.

I entered the hospital on August 12 with contractions every 3 minutes and 6-7 cm dialated - everything said the baby would be here soon. I was in denial - the contractions started when I woke up that morning, my mother in law was here watching Dashy so I could continue my home bedrest. I didn't tell her anything - i took a bath, tried to relax, packed a bag, called my husband. My husband came home, my mother in law was confused and we left for the hospital. We checked in and waited - for a very long time. I didn't look like I was in labor, there was no pain. I was talking and joking while we waited. I saw a friend's son walk in the lobby wearing a Big Brother shirt with his grandparents - she had just had her baby. My friend told me later that her inlaws told her that they saw one of her friends in the lobby - she asked if the person was pregnant, they said no. I didn't look super pregnant, I didn't look like I was in labor. I was. Again. Once I was finally put back in Triage - the same nurse that had declared that we were having this baby 2 weeks ago was working. She said I was 8 cm and the calmest person in advanced later that she had ever seen without drugs. I was put in an L&D room - it seems like there was confusion. The nurse orginally said they would not try to stop the labor - it was happening that day. The doctor came in - checked me and thought I was only 6cm, the orders where changed. They were going to try to stop it now. They tried Terbutiline - it did nothing except make me jittery. The doctors decided to start Magnesium (yuck) - not thinking it would work but it apparently it can help reduce the risk of CP in preemies. It worked. My labor stalled. In the morning I was moved to a Antepartum room.

To be perfectly honest - it was new and nice. I had my own large flat screen TV, 24 hour room service, wireless internet and a nice wheelchair accessible shower. Later that day, they took my IV's out. I was a free woman - well as free as someone can be when they are confined to a bed 23 hours a day. I napped, I read, I talked on the phone. Dash came to see me. My contractions all but disappeared. There was talk about me going home again the next morning but the doctor and I decided it would be best to stay at least a few more days. Brent came to see me on Saturday night, we played Scrabble and watched 3 episodes of Dexter. It was getting late, my Ambien was waiting and he was getting ready to leave. For some reason, he stayed to watch one more Dexter episodes - something about that loveable seriel killer that draws you in, and half way into it, something happened. My water broke. This time there would be no stopping the labor, I was too far dialated. This baby was really coming early. It was scary and exciting at the same time. One moment we were watching Dexter throw dead bodies into the ocean - the next, our whole lives were about to change. My heart raced, I wasn't sure what to do . I paged the nurse, she answered saying she would bring my sleeping pill. Change of plans - I think my water broke. She came in with some sort of test - there was no need for it. There was a lot of water. Things started happening - there were people and extra large wheelchairs and the hum of Dexter continuing to play on Netflix as decisions where made, personal items packed and we started the short journey to where our lives would change forever.

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