Thursday, February 24, 2011


i am venting here because I don't know where else to vent and my husband was just pretending to listening to me when i was telling him the story. i am annoyed.

I am going to start by saying I know I am lucky to be able to stay at home with my babies, i get to spend every moment with them, every day. I get to majority of the hugs and kisses and I love it most of the time. But I do not think it is easy and there are days it is incredibly stressful. I worked until dash was 1 1/2 and I can say it was so much easier for me to be a working mama, by the time i picked him from daycare, he was too tired to play, so my house stayed relatively clean. I only had to change a couple of poopy diapers a week. He wasn't as attached to me so I didn't have a 30 pound magnet stuck on my leg. I got to eat lunch out every afternoon with people my age and without making sure my child isn't throwing food or trying to escape. We had a lot more money so I could buy whatever I wanted and plan trips whenever I felt like it. That being said, I am thankful for my messy toy filled house, and the peanut butter handprints on my cabinents and everything else that is involved with being a stay at home mom.

I try not to take things too personally and am totally a non confrontation kind of person but I was talking to a friend, B, on the phone this morning. Someone I hang out with during the week, go to the park together or the mall, or whatever. She stays at home with her daughter but also watches 2 little boys everyday. She takes them wherever she goes. Our mutual friend had posted on facebook this morning that she couldn't wait until the weekend because it had been such a stressful week at home with her 2 kids. B says to me, "I can't believe X said she was excited for the weekend, every day is her weekend because she doesn't work". Umm, what? She has a 2 year old and a 6 month old and I am sure she is not just sitting on her ass feeding her kids cheerios all day long. I responded by saying, "I look forward to the weekend every week, hell, I look forward to 7 p.m. when my husband gets home everyday, its hard to stay at home every day." B got all confrontatinal and pissy and said "you just don't understand, you don't work - it is your own kid, you can just lock him in his room for timeout when he is misbehaving." Does she not know my child, if I locked Dash in his room, he would somehow manage to climb to the top of the closet and pretend to be superman. I don't know why I got so annoyed - she was just saying that it was harder for her to stay at home with her daugher (who i might add could use a dose of discipline, and that is coming from a very lenient parent) and 2 little boys who whenever we are anywhere just lay on the ground (they are not quite normal) and who take 4 hour naps every afternoon, even though they are 2 and 4. I am sure it is difficult to watch someone else's kids - but staying at home with your own kids every day is not a vacation, it is not the weekend. There is noone to help contain my crazy kid or feed the baby or pick up the toys for the 5 millionth time or to go grocery shopping or anything else we do. It is a job and a lot of days I am thankful that I survived the day. I am glad I am able to be a stay at home mama to my boys - but I don't want someone to think I am being lazy for staying at home or on some vacation,or a never ending weekend - it is work, damnit. don't judge me - especially by someone who basically is a stay at home mama and knows what bad days at home are like.

(sorry this is long and doesn't really make sense, but I am uber annoyed at this person and had to vent)

1 comment:

  1. I completely understand! My husband and my BFF feel the same way about me. Anytime I complain about being tired or say that I am so ready to have a few minutes off they talk about how lucky I am to be a SAHM and not have to "work." They think I sit at home all day and do nothing and that the house cleans its self.